So why am I so afraid of it? When does the fear stop? Does it ever?
Last evening the sky looked like if some promising impressionist laddered herself :) up and splashed a perfect combination of blue, purple, and pink right above. Amazing. And it made me think how colours differ from one minute to another. And we don't really see that unless we stop and look up.
We have been looking up a lot, lately, my kids and I. Which is a good thing. The best, really. It makes all of us think about what we are doing here, why are we here. Even the little one seems to be in the thoughtful mood sometimes, provided that there is a secured supply of chocolate cookies available at short distance and in no time.
They say when you love someone, you should invest in your feelings, or the love will stop, and bitterness will come instead. And I guess that is true no matter who your loved one is. While we still fight from time to time, while we are in the process of constant learning about each others, while the neighbour sends us polite letters informing he can indeed hear little feet thumping from as early as 'six am in the morning' (the double effect there shows how truly disturbing they feel, and rightly so...), in the middle of all of this we are constantly changing, growing, and improving (or this is just my inaccurate version of the real things happening, but that is another story - who can truly say one's version is the real one anyway).
So there is no need to fear. Unless you are that guy from Amelie who could crack into pieces the minute he would let go of any of his hundreds of pillows installed on every possible corner of every single piece of furniture, equipment, and tool available in his flat. I hope and wish you are not.