When you look for sth here

Saturday 28 February 2015

When was the last time...

... You did something for the first time?

I read it somewhere (ok, it was on Facebook), and it struck me. It painfully showed me how predictable and boring my life has recently become. That is, in the last six years, or so. While it should be one of the most unique and precious, and memorable experiences of my life, the motherhood suddenly formed into plain, non-adventurous short-term planned existence, with nappies, tantrums, and truly exiting visits to playgrounds at the centre of attention.
I might have exaggerated a bit right now, showing only one side of the story (omitting the emotions, the moments, the spontaneous loveyoumummy words, the joy and laughter). The purpose though was to wake me up a bit, and try identifying again who I am. Who all of the mothers are when they are no longer on their own, having another human being in charge of them. Although, technically, and legally, it's the other way round.
I guess we tend to forget our true inner me when we are snowed under everyday stuff. I guess that's the reason why all the meditation, yoga (which I love, by the way), and relaxation techniques became so popular. But the thing is, none of these is needed. All you need is 5 minutes a day to stop. And think. Who you are. Where you're going with your life. What was nice that happen to you today. What made you sad. How can you work around those happy moments to live better tomorrow.
No need for 25-year success story planned in details to define you (even when such long-term perspective can improve your everyday life, as you stay focus on what you really want to do).

Funny how those cliche discoveries come to me now. Better later than never, I guess (and I have a suspicious feeling that last quote came to me several times here already:).


Friday 27 February 2015

What is in a name

'What is in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet'
Shakespeare.
The guy who probably never really existed (the are many claiming the opposite, my secondary school literature teacher included), yet so many versatile quotes floating around for the last 500 years, or so.

Recently I noticed the overwhelming popularity of twisted names.
A rose is no longer the rose, there is some multi-petal delicately scented flower representative available instead. I mean, are there any sellers left out there, or have they all been successfully swollen by shop attendants, retail assistants, or - in extreme cases - partners (apologies, Waitrose)? What about janitors, or caretakers? There are Site Managers now serving the dwellers, or the Concierge Representatives doing exactly the same work but for a title ranking high to the stars.

I have absolutely nothing against anybody working, quite envy in a way; in fact I respect and value all who have enough guts, will and motivation to work rather than put the lame 'I'm in need for some cash' sign and sit. It's just funny to see how the descriptive name of a job evaluated to another level, sometimes next to an absurd, or a ridiculous one. All in the name of appearing more important without the need of actually showing the importance of your actions. All in the name of time passing by, and necessity to instantly prove something.


Therefore I have become a respectful and graceful childcare provider (don't you dare calling me a minder!:) for my small gang of two. Which usually feels like 6. But that's another story...

Monday 23 February 2015

Demotivational week

It's been a long week away from posting. Half-term, and nothing more needed to be said:)
However, I turned away from my usual, occasionally emerging ability to identify useful ways of spending time with my precious ones.
I finally become lazy, and I am not afraid to admit it, for once.
Therefore, the past week was a pure definition of staying-in, laying-in, watching cartoons, playing games, becoming almost friends (acquaintances, at least) with several members of staff at local McDonald's, going for a walk, or two (only when a balcony with bubbles was not enough, or when there was an urgent need for waffles as an extremely healthy tea option).
Surprisingly to me, that totally laid back approach totally worked in a sense of bonding, and limiting agony of being somewhere on time, despite a flock of ducks passing by down the river, becoming absolutely wonderful and worth looking at for ages.
This week, we were the starers. And we really enjoyed it.

And I think I underestimated the power of doing nothing up until now. And discovering that at the age of 37 was somehow refreshing. And yes, it might be devastating for my foreseeable future when becoming a habit. Do I care? Not as much as I used to. I know it won't, so why bother?

Friday 13 February 2015

You gave your best shot ...

... And that's important - we read in the Chinese myth about the Great Race which formed the calendar, from Rat to Pig. I guess today it is rarely the case to hear that, unless you're involved into your 6-year old school achievements, and want to encourage her, not frighten.

I finally understood why they called it a rat race. Over-ambitious, frightening, heart-weakening, pointless really, and missing the point of any joy in life. The Rat in the myth decided to push his up-till-then best friend, Cat, from the Ox's back to make sure he, not anyone else, is first. Why? To be the first in the 12-year cycle?

I guess we miss the point too often nowadays. Looks like it all started 'several moons ago'...

(Looks like I'm really bouncing back to youth at an accelerated rate. Not just because I got into the body shop new beauty routine. Rather due to child-centered literature I dig into these days...)


Tuesday 10 February 2015

Brainstorming ideas and beyond in brief

It's nearly 2am, an insane hour when my Mini-Man would usually request a hug, but for some mysterious reason this is not the case this time.

I'm buying a silver metal wine bottle stopper at some 'non European' eBay shop. Doesn't sound like a reasonable 35+ mother of 2, actually coincidently a 35+2, does it?;)))

Oh, and my hair went crazy. 'What did you do to your hair; I've never seen them so ... curly;)?' - 'Well, I washed them, and used some decent sensitive scalp mask/conditioner , which appears to have a surprise-gift side-effect' ...

And I am seriously thinking of organising a book club for mums. It might be a virtual one, but a real occasional meet-up would be nice. 


This is what a sucked-into-'toddlership'-lifestyle can do to you.